by Jack Guarnieri, PinballSales.com & ShuffleAlley.com

Helpful Tips on How to Get a Better Handle on Problems

When you politely ask someone how they are doing, sometimes what you get back is a laundry list of their problems. After I hear some of them, I feel a lot better.

Our friend Peggy's Grandma Phelps said: "If everyone hung their problems out on the clothesline, you would pick yours back." There are so many sayings that we can always call upon to bring a smile or remind us of wise advice. I've had my share on the clothesline this year, and I hope these next three months of 2006 are better than the first nine.

I've found that there never seems to be a shortage of two things, garbage and problems. Problems are around us seemingly all the time. It's how you navigate around those problems that matter. Some days I picture myself as a captain of a glass bottom boat in a mine-laden sea. Every day is a challenge, and how well you handle those problems will determine many things.

I have learned a few things over the years that work for me most of the time.

Don't get excited: Whatever comes my way, I deal with it. Running a company means that the proverbial buck stops with you - or it should. You need to be the rock and keep your head on straight. You need to absorb and weigh the situation, quickly if it's an urgent issue. Yelling and screaming is not a good response. Killing the messenger is not a good idea either. Your immediate reaction to a problem is usually witnessed by a customer, another employee or both. Take a moment to collect your thoughts and deal with the problem in your own way.

Think, then act: Take time to react but don't become a ruminator - actions speak louder than words, but inaction is deafening.

Calculate your response: This must be tempered with what is fair, honest, just and what experience has taught you. Did you ever deal with a similar problem? What did you do and what was the outcome? Strength and patience are important, but a true leader must be willing to go to the mat sometimes. If there are people in your life creating problems, get out of their way or create bigger problems for them. That will distract them from creating more problems.

Don't be a pushover: If you are right, defend what is right without being stubborn or spiteful. If you are wrong, admit it, say you are sorry, correct it, learn from it and move forward.

Take the test: Ask that question and fill in the blank with the person you most admire, What Would _________ Do?

Here are a few more pieces of advice about handling troublesome situations.

Talk to friends and family about a situation. Solicit their advice. Ask other business owners what they would do.

Don't say or write things you will regret. Don't respond to an email when you are hot. If you must vent, write the email to yourself and read it in the morning as if you were the intended recipient. Avoid the last word syndrome, which shows weakness not strength.

It's not the end of the world. Just focus on what is truly important and guide yourself out of the woods. Admit that you don't know everything and that you are doing the best that you can.

Be good to other people and respect them, even with their problems. Take time to listen to others not just to hear them. Remember to take care of yourself, too. Without you, what happens?

Aside from your family, your own health is the most important thing you have. Working, worrying, stress, family obligations and illnesses all take a toll. Nobody is exempt.

Maybe you took a summer vacation. Did you take along a cell phone, blackberry or laptop? Did you take along some work for review or some reports that needed to be completed? That's not a vacation. Perhaps you took your family along with you - some people will say that's not a vacation either. If the kids are fighting or your spouse has one plan and you have another, staying home and going to work might have been a better idea.

Some people can turn on and off what most of us call work and relax and recharge their batteries. Some people claim that they thrive on their careers and that they do not need a vacation. I don't believe that as evidenced by many pictures of me and others on vacation over the years in RePlay.

Europeans have the right idea. Seemingly whole countries are on holiday during August. Americans seem to be working longer hours and getting further behind. If I had a 9-to-5 job, I would be "working" about 50 hours less a week.

So back to the troubled waters we discussed earlier. Surrounded by a sea of problems, there is an oasis of elusive happiness because happiness is truly a state of mind. Dealing with problems will not make most of us happy. Solving or avoiding those problems gets us to the oasis.

If you have a laundry list of problems, start picking them off the clothesline and deal with them one by one. Maybe some are work or family or personal, but rather than taking the laundry to the river and banging it on a rock, think of Grandma Phelps' words and cheer up: it could always be worse!

Jack Guarnieri started fixing electro-mechanical pinball machines in 1975 and has been involved in every phase of the coin-op game business since then. He operated a substantial game route in Brooklyn, N.Y., developed amusement centers and was called in as a consultant to manage Mondial Distributing and State Sales in New Jersey. In 1999, he founded PinballSales.com to sell coin-op to the home market. In 2002, he founded ShuffleAlley.com and released the Parker Bohn III Pro Bowler game, reviving the shuffle alley. His positive attitude, honest insights and opinions have made him a popular figure in the trade. While managing and growing his businesses, he still consults inside and outside the industry, and his marketing, promotional and business management expertise are widely sought. He's very active in his church, community and charitable causes as well. You can learn more at his websites (www.PinballSales.com and www.ShuffleAlley.com) or by phoning him at 866/323-JACK. Email is Jack@Pinballsales.com.

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